1949. Wendy, who lived in the house to one side of ours, was
the sort of friend you just didn’t see for weeks, and then all of a sudden,
there she was, in charge of one of the big events in your life. She was like a
pony, filled with spirit and pride and determined to live life in precisely the
way that made the most sense and would bring her the most fun.
I liked that. Occasionally, it made me want to involve her
in my life more often. I mean, there was nothing resembling romance here—I
wasn’t the slightest bit interested in romance yet, though I didn’t, like many
of my male friends, think girls were yucky and gross. She just sometimes seemed
an apt friend, someone I could rely on. Even though, in many ways, she always
proved that she wasn’t. She was sort of like a toy gun that had a way of going
off at the wrong time, leaving scars.
In any case, she decided that we should meet behind her
house one afternoon after school while the sun was still warming the grass and
give one another an anatomy lesson. We would hide behind her parents’ garage,
lower our shorts, and compare our private parts.
I was rather pleased with this project. I’d never seen what
a girl looked like in the nether regions and I wanted to know. And there was an
odd, indescribable thrill to the idea of showing off my own apparatus. My
whatsit, thingie, “wee-wee” was a total mystery to me, of course. It could
suddenly get smaller or larger or it could change shape, sort of like a snail’s
antenna but, of course, it served quite well the purposes of peeing, which I
often found very important…but also rather funny, for some reason. My best
friend T.J. and I sometimes peed patterns into the dust with great pleasure, or
left our mark far from our homes on the fences of vacant lots.
So Wendy and I marched rather giddily into her yard, behind
her garage, and stood for a moment, each of us waiting for the other to be the
first. Wendy was never to be outdone, though, so she pulled her shorts to the
ground abruptly as if she were showing them she was definitely in charge.
Showing me, as well.
Not yet looking at her, I pulled my own down as gracefully
as I could. And we stood there.
I was shocked. “Wendy!” I said, looking with interest and
concern at her crotch. “There’s nothing there!”
“Is too!” she responded, looking down. It’s called a
vergina, and my mom has told me that mine is very healthy.”
She added, “I had hoped you might have found it
attractive—you know—compared to other verginas.”
“But I don’t have any other verginas to compare it to,
Wendy! And so far, it doesn’t look like a vergina is anything but a few little
folds in your skin.”
Wendy looked at me with fierce anger in her eyes. Then she
did a deep knee bend and pointed at herself. “See?” she said. I looked at her
young apparatus. I saw.
“This,” she explained is where I go pee-pee. It’s a very handy thing.”
“But you can’t point it,” I said. “You can’t aim it.”
“Yes I can. I never miss the potty. I can aim.”
She looked at my young apparatus. “And what is that funny
thing? It’s so small. Compared to my Dad’s wee-wee, it’s an itsy-bitsy midget.”
This was not going entirely well. “It gets the job done,” I
said, starting to pull my shorts back up.
“Okay,” she said. “Fine. But what is it called?”
“Like you just said about your Dad’s. It’s a wee-wee.”
“No,” she countered. “It has an older people name. You could
call mine a wee-wee, too, but it’s really
a vergina.”
I zipped up my shorts. “Well,” I said, my voice darkened by
regret, “I really don’t know what it’s called. I just call it my wee-wee.”
“What does your mom call it?”
I was silent again. “Wee-wee, I think.”
“We’re not getting anywhere here, are we, Billy? I think
that, as soon as you can, you should ask your Mom what it’s called. Will you do
that for me?” That, as it turns out, was the way her mother talked to her when she was getting angry, and when
her mother yelled at her, you could hear it—easily—four streets away. So I
quickly promised her, “Okay, I’ll find out,” and started out of the yard.
“Find out today,” she called to me. “Or I may get mad.”
Suddenly, I remembered once again why I didn’t play with
Wendy all that often.
>>>
I aroused my mother’s suspicion later that afternoon by
saying I wanted to take a bath. “What’s up?” she asked. “You’ve never wanted to take a bath before.”
“I do today,” I explained pithily. “I actually like playing
in the bathtub,” I explained.
Mother looked at me sternly. “Well, don’t splash water all
over the place. If I have to clean up a bunch of water on the floor, I’m going
to be very angry.”
“I know,” I said, as cheerily as I could. “I’ll be careful.”
“Darn right you will,” she affirmed, and marched me
unceremoniously into the bathroom. “Take off your clothes while I fill the
bathtub,” she ordered, “then bring your Howdy Doody towel over here. And don’t
drop it on the floor.
When she had filled the tub, the water, as always, was far
too hot, but I got into it without complaint. I dropped my World War II combat
destroyer in and it quickly got lost among the bubbles. So I steered it
carefully to a safe port and called to shore on what I pretended to be the
boat’s radio, “We are taking on water. SOS. We are taking on water.” Then,
ceremoniously, I pushed the boat underwater and it made its back-and-forth way
to the bottom of the bathtub.
“Um, Mom?” I said, off-handedly. “What is my thing—you know,
my wee-wee—really called?”
“Who wants to know?” Mother asked, and I hoped she didn’t
see the flash of fear light up my eyes.
“I want to know,” I said. “I think I’m old enough to know
what it’s called.”
She started to laugh. It was more of a sympathetic laughter
than a derisive laughter. I was glad for that.
“It’s called a--” She was splashing the soap from my body
and I didn’t quite hear what she said.
“A what?” I asked.
She repeated herself. But she couldn’t possibly have said
that. A peanut? I distinctly heard
her say, ‘a peanut.’ I would never, ever live this down. What would I do?
Finding no alternative, and hoping she would set me
straight, I told Wendy that very evening, “My mother told me it’s called a
‘peanut.’”
“What?” Wendy cried out, laughing. “A peanut?”
“That’s what she said,” I affirmed.
“You’re crazy!” Wendy declared, and started to laugh and,
once she had started to laugh, she started to howl.
“Billy’s got a peanut!” she yelled for the neighborhood to
hear. “Billy’s got a PEANUT.”
I ran home. Waiting at the door for me was my Mom.
“Billy’s got a what?” she asked, slowly and evenly.
“It’s what you said!” I shouted, accusingly.
“And you, Mr. Dumbhead, went and told that to Wendy?”
I started to cry, feeling utterly trapped.
It only earned me one powerful slap on the bottom. Then Mom
gave me a little lecture. “Be careful what you say to girls, especially that
little girl. If you give her something that she can make you feel bad with,
she’ll use it. It’s as simple as that.”
I nodded my head earnestly.
“Is that why you wanted to take a bath last night?” she
asked and I kept nodding. “For some god-forsaken reason—and I don’t want to
know what it was—you wanted to find out what your penis is called?” I stopped
nodding.
“Penis?” I asked, sensing my way out of this mess.
“Yes,” Mom said. “Penis. But you haven’t really shown me
you’re old enough to know that, like you said last night.”
As soon as I could sneak away, I ran next door and told
Wendy—who was in the process of making a sign that read, simply, “Boys has
peanuts”—that she had misheard me. “I said ‘penis,’ not ‘peanut’! This
information I delivered with as much dignity as I could muster.
“What kind of word is ‘pee-niss’?” she demanded.
“What kind of word is ‘vergina’?” I countered.
She looked at me blankly.
“And Wendy,” I declared solemnly, “ I won’t be telling you
any more secret things. Ever. Especially about…you know.”
“No, Billy, I don’t know.”
“Do too,” I argued.
“Not,” she said.
“Too,” I said. And I left, clutching at least a fragment of
my dignity, which was buoyed by my resolve not to tell something like this to a
girl again. Ever.